excruciating

i dont know what i'm going through right now. i feel too guilty for words. i'm sorry for being like this. i don't know how i'm gonna get my way back to you. hopeless illusions are just too demoralising to think of. i'm sorry if i'm expecting too much. i know i've heard you said i have the right but oh well, i set the bar to high i guess. it's like i know what i exactly want of you, i tried. expectations are like hanging in the air, and time is running out. this is the most crucial time of the year, i really need to spend time with myself and contemplate my thoughts, and let the days get by without having to think of this.

i'm sorry.